5 Ways To Make Friends In A New Place
Congratulations, you did it! You started a new job. You’re going to school. You needed a change of pace. Whatever the reason, you’re embarking on the next chapter of your life in a new and exciting place. All you need now are some friends to celebrate with! Maintaining friendships and meeting new people is difficult in general, let alone in a new place, and the obligations and opportunities of adulthood can make it hard to carve out space for platonic relationships in our lives. But wherever you are, you deserve a support circle of people to care for and to care for you in ways big and small. Without further ado, here are some tips for making friends anywhere you go!
Find Mutual Friends
You may not know anyone in your new city, but that doesn’t mean you don’t know someone who does. And who better to introduce you to people than someone you already know and love? If you haven’t already, ask friends or family if they know anyone who lives in your new home who you could grab coffee or a meal with. The more people you ask, the more likely it is that someone will know someone else in your area they can connect you with. Knowing that you have a friend and a city in common takes some of the pressure off, but there’s still plenty more for you to get to know about each other. When making plans, have your new friend show you one of their favorite spots in the city and don’t forget to ask if they have any advice for newcomers. In short: A friend of your friend is a friend of yours!
Visit a Third Place
Kick off your new life by kicking it old school. In sociology, the term “third place” refers to the spaces people gather that aren’t at work or home. These include bars, parks, restaurants, libraries, or any other public spaces that encourage socializing and spending time. By frequenting your local third places, you’ll kill two birds with one stone. (1) You’ll get a sense of what your new neighborhood has to offer and (2) you can meet new people to enjoy those offerings alongside. Make an effort to stop by the same cafe or bar once a week. Try different things on the menu. Ask the staff for recommendations. (Tip well!) Get to know the regular crowd. In a sea of options it’s only natural to want to try as many as you can, but there are benefits to being a creature of habit, too!
Go to Events
Remember those “third places,” we just spoke about? They’re good for more than just hanging around! There’s nothing like a good old fashioned bulletin board (or events calendar or Facebook page) to keep you up to date on what’s going on in your community. Does your local library host a book club? Is there trivia at the pub down the street? Are there online groups for craft circles or running clubs or pick-up basketball games? There’s bound to be something that interests you happening nearby. Join a recurring group or try to stop by an event or two a month to get out of the house and meet people with similar hobbies and interests. Remember, if you’re going to an event to make new friends, there’s a pretty good chance that others will be doing the same. Keep an open mind, you might be surprised by how friendly people can be!
Host a Social
You’ve called on your friends, you’ve found a third (and fourth and fifth) place, and you’re the best knitter the city’s drop-in craft circle has ever seen. In the process, you’ve made some connections, and maybe even a few friends. Now it’s time to bring them together! When you’re making new friends, it’s easy to forget that being open to meeting new people isn’t just what’s making it possible for you to interact, it’s also a desire you have in common. Pay that love forward by introducing your new friends to one another. Host a picnic or a movie night or a dinner party, something low effort and fun to bring together the people in your life. You may have started this process as the person looking for friends, but in time, you might find yourself becoming a friendship matchmaker, too!
And of course… Skip the Small Talk!
This one is a bit of a no brainer, but if you’re looking to make new connections in a safe and supportive environment, you should join us for Skip the Small Talk! We offer in-person speed-friending events across the country and online, where attendees get together to ask and answer questions to learn more about each other and themselves. Think of it like a traveling third space, but where you know that every person in the room is there for the exact same reason as you. Learn more about Skip the Small Talk here and check out an event near you.